Last
year (when my New Year’s resolution still included weight loss) I signed myself
and two of my gal pals up for the local version of Biggest Loser. We vowed that we would work out at least four
times a week at the gym. And I was going
to…until the first day I walked into the gym and saw that half the town had
also made the same vow. There haven’t
been that many sweaty bodies outside of an orgy since the 70’s. For the next month I worked out outside…in
January, until the weaker resolutionists died out and I had room to workout
inside. I assume this year will be no
different, with the exception I will not be working out outside. I’ll wait until February to work out thanks. Of course I could always workout at home and
torture my own family with my Lycra covered ass, but they gave me really nice
gifts for Christmas, so I won’t do that to them.
So
in the spirit of New Year’s resolution motivation, I have found some
motivational posters, and edited them with “in bed” like you would with the
fortune of a Chinese fortune cookie. So
enjoy…in bed.
I hear your mom’s easy in
bed.
I’ve actually found that’s
not necessarily true.
Unless you’re into hookers,
of course.
Beast mode off! Beast mode off!
Yeah, like “Sorry honey, not
tonight. I have a headache.”
Yep, that’s how it works.
Arthur Ashe didn’t actually
say that.
No need to answer that! Please.
It’s a ginger thing.
Untrue. I prefer to take up 80% of the bed and sleep
in until 10.
Um, did you do it wrong
yesterday?
That’s what he said.
I want to be the most
successful person in the world…said no woman ever!
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