Monkeys. Love them or hate them, people have been keeping them as pets for a really long time. I used to work at a petting zoo when I was in high school, where part of my job included hanging out with a monkey named Squeaks. I really liked him. I mean, he never went outside and fell asleep against the door locking my inside like the George the Galapagos Tortoise did. That guy was a dick.
From that day on, I haven't liked monkeys.
Look at this guy, he just looks like an asshole. He would definitely shit on someone. That is definitely a communistic hat he’s wearing.
This is Alf. Meaning, if you’re going to have a monkey, you can’t have a cat. Or ya know, company.
I think I have seen this guy in the movie Up.
Is this guy wearing dentures?
Oh, and the biggest reason I won’t have a pet monkey. They are drunks! It’s embarrassing!